Sidemeat – 34th Slice
books
The Diary of a Wimpy Kid Series
I can’t help but feel my “parent senses” go off as I read this series of popular books aloud to my son. They’re supposed to be funny, but at what expense? Although at times sincere, this is a series based around an unlikable, unsympathetic character, who is surrounded by even more unlikable characters. The real-life Greg Heffley would’ve either hung himself in a closet by now or retreated fully into habitual marijuana use.
A few quick fun-facts about me… I was essentially thrown into parenthood long before I was ready. In fact, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be ready. I’ve never been taken with children – I’m still not – but somewhere along the way I learned to have tolerance and patience with my own. I’ve never read a book about parenting. I’ve never sought advice on an issue. For the most part, I’ve totally winged it, at the most applying some vague psychological concept to child rearing once in a while. I don’t obsess over the choices I make. I try to be fair and I make sure I apologize when I’m wrong. I’m actually amazed at how meticulously some people approach parenthood. I won’t say it’s easy – it isn’t – but it isn’t a science to be studied and replicated…it’s an artform that is unique to every parent and child, something that must be created, discovered, and adjusted constantly. I don’t know how my son will turn out and I don’t know how my imperfections as a parent will manifest, but I do know that whatever happens he’ll know that I cared about him, did my best to make him happy, and treated him like a real person: a mistake that far too many parents make in their desperation to establish a firm dominant-submissive relationship with their children.
That being said, I don’t believe in sheltering children. I don’t believe in needless overexposure either, but I’m not going to be the one who must give a scrutinizing stamp of approval to every bit of media my child consumes. For the most part, my kid is still a little too young to be dipping into controversial territory. He’s actually very conscientious when he wants to be. We casually watched an alien movie when he couldn’t sleep one night rated PG-13 (come to think of it it was Dark Skies – not even particularly scary but it does have some creepy shots of the aliens; the shot where we see the alien for the very first time as a bizarre shadow in the little boy’s room has been burned into his memory) that freaked him out a couple of years ago, and ever since then he’s approached anything above PG with trepidation. As we roll through the carpool lane in the mornings blaring Sublime or Blink-182, he hurriedly tells me to “turn down the bad words!” before the teacher or a student helper gets close enough to open the door. However, if we’re listening to something like The Killers or The Ramones, he doesn’t say a word about it. He’s smart, and typically, he uses his intelligence to not cause waves.
Lately he’s gotten to a point where he can actually sit down and read a book and enjoy it provided it’s something that interests him. For the last year or so we made our way through the Captain Underpants series. Yeah, it’s one page of toilet humor after another – farting, body odor, puking, boogers, belching, poopy and peepee, and all those other bodily functions that so endlessly fascinate elementary school children – but there’s a sincerity there that speaks to these children in their own language. I don’t enjoy it, but that’s not the point. He does. It’s disgusting, but it’s harmless. And it’s not it’s putting this stuff in his head, it’s already there, Captain Underpants is just using it to entertain him.
Recently though, we finished up Captain Underpants. Not only did we read all of them, but we read the very last one that just hit shelves not too long ago. (Caveat: The two main characters in the series are a couple of young boys. In this last book, they end up visiting grown up versions of themselves, one of them married to a woman, the other married to a man. It was presented as natural and a non-issue, and although I applaud the attempt, I think it was a strange decision the writer’s part. Realistically, Harold (the one who ended up gay) would be full of questions. Anyway, it was definitely a little unexpected to see such a development.) Taking a cue from his older half-sister (who I spent 5 years raising since she was 6 months old and who I never see anymore…), he moved over to the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series. We’ve made it through 6 or 7 books (I think), and though he’s at the age where he’s able to read significant portions on his own, he still likes to wind down at night with 30 to 40 minutes of being read to. At first, I thought these books had a clever way of tapping into that middle-school awkwardness that elementary kids are just starting to feel the twangs of. But the deeper we got, the more I began to wonder just what the point of these books was…
The books are told from the perspective one of Greg Heffley, a supposedly typical middle schooler going through typical middle school horrors with family, friends, girls, teachers, and life in general. I remember middle school all too well…and I hated it. From now until forever, I will unequivocally rate 6th grade as the worst school year by leaps and bounds. In elementary school I was totally oblivious…by the time I got to high school I understood enough of what was going on to make choices and understand their repercussions…but middle school…wow. It was like everything was important, except I had no idea why it was important or what any of it meant. I mean all of a sudden it mattered what pants you wore, whether you bought lunch or brought it, what kind of haircut you had…the “in crowd” is in a fledgling but rapidly evolving state of development and just like that, your actions brand you as either “cool” or not.
In reality no one is cool at that age, least of all the kids who actually think they’re cool, but unfortunately none of that really matters. All that matters is what everyone else thinks, and there ain’t a damn thing anyone can do about it. It sucks, and it’s tough to push through it. We all lose an important piece of our innocence pushing through that pre-adolescent minefield, and we all emerge on the other side as different people. The best we can hope for is that the parts that make you you survive the ride, and that the experience empowers you instead of embittering you.
So yeah, I have some pretty strong feelings about that time of life, and I guess I figured that someone who’d made their career out of writing books that spoke to children this age would have some of the same lamentations. No, I do not expect reams of philosophical and/or social discourse among the pages of Diary of a Wimpy Kid, but I kind of thought that some of these fears and trials and crises would shine through.
What we actually end up with is something quite different. I was expecting to see some of myself in Greg and to root for him and wish for his triumph in all situations. Instead, I find the character deplorable. First of all, he’s selfish, sneaky, and deceitful, and tends to be a bit of a narcissist with a bad case of unwarranted self-importance. It’s true that we’re all pretty much 99.8% self-absorbed at that age, but this Greg is a truly pathetic human being. At times I do feel sorry for him (especially regarding his family life, which I’ll get to in a minute) but most of the time I feel like he gets what he deserves.
What I hate the most is that Greg is only ever interested in Greg, and much of what I’ve read sees him attempt feeble acts of manipulation. He treats his best friend Rowley like shit, and we all know that at that age the one thing we can count on is that one good friend who seems to be in exactly the same boat we’re in. Instead of navigating the tribulations of middle school together though, Greg walks all over him and constantly dreams up ways to somehow benefit from Rowley’s circumstances using trickery and holding almost no regard for the feelings of his best friend. Rowley, though naive and dimwitted, also possesses a degree of integrity that usually gets him out from under Greg’s machinations, and usually sees him end up on the better side of the conflict. Despite witnessing this time and time again, Greg never really seems to grasp that Rowley’s “uncoolness” is what draws them together, and that if Greg would just accept his own uncoolness, he’d be a lot better off.
Now I get that kids this age are practicing a tough balancing act between maintaining a cool and calm exterior and satiating the inner child screaming “gimme gimme gimme instant self-gratification!” but we’re supposed to be reading his diary, his innermost, personal thoughts. What I find disturbing is that even through this intensely private platform, Greg seems to hold very little genuine affection, regard, or even respect for anything. Naturally diaries are going to be full of all the nasty comments and the bitching and the griping that we stop ourselves from expressing out loud…but they’re also going to contain moments of tenderness, sensitivity, honesty, and vulnerability…none of which Greg appears to experience in any meaningful or lasting way. Isn’t it a little weird that even within the privacy of a diary he can’t ever seem to admit that there are things in his life that he values just as highly as his own whims and desires?
Yeah, I’ll concede that Greg has some funny stories to tell and that his matter-of-fact, almost deadpan recollection of events is humorous, but at the end of it all he is just so exquisitely empty that it truly bothers me! Perhaps the single most egregious flaw that really sets off red flags in my mind is his total lack of remorse. We can chalk up his “mistakes” to his immaturity or his irresponsibility or whatever, except he never seems to learn from his mistakes – or even realize that he’s done anything wrong at all except in the sense that he got caught. We make lots of fumbles in our interpersonal relationships at this age but in doing so we also learn what not to do again. Greg never seems to understand the moral of the story. Despite his plethora of mistakes and constant failures, it doesn’t seem like we ever see Greg come me out on the other side with a better understanding of “right” versus “wrong.”
Maybe even more disturbing is the fact that this kid never seems to be truly happy. He has periods where he’s intensely pleased with himself or satisfied with he outcome of a scheme, but I don’t think he ever experiences a moment of real happiness. They guy is 100% miserable, something I find a little irksome.
Now we get to take a look at the bigger picture – is Greg a straight up burgeoning psychopath devoid of empathy and remorse? Or is he an unfortunate product of his far-from-ideal family environment? When he’s not being a selfish brat, he’s actually getting pretty heavily shit on by his alleged “loving family.” As a parent, I’m often appalled by the behavior of his family towards him.
At their absolute best, Greg’s parents are just plain neglectful and inattentive of Greg’s needs (else they might notice his rampant disregard for the feelings of others). It would’ve been more realistic (or at least more affable) to present the parents as overwhelmed, but instead we get a disaffected and uninterested father and an aloof mother who is so out of touch with her children that she can’t even begin to grasp how out of touch she is. I find it interesting that the books depict very little interaction between the mother and father, though I suppose we can chalk this up to Greg’s self-absorption and the fact that these stories are told through his point of view.
The father is noticeably distant from all 3 of the children. Were we dealing with more adult content, I might suspect something as drastic as a closeted homosexual or deepening affair (possibly both?). He rarely makes his voice heard and from what we see of him (i.e. what Greg tells us), it becomes a little more obvious where Greg’s sheepish and apathetic demeanor come from.
The mother, on the other hand, spends most of her time in an alternate reality, failing to recognize even the most basic tendencies of her children. She often throws Rodrick (Greg’s older brother) and Greg together as if they’re best friends, oblivious to Rodrick’s constant torment of Greg. Rarely does she differentiate between the two boys, other than to allow Rodrick a few more creature comforts due to his age. Beyond a doubt though, the mom’s favorite is the demon spa–, I mean, youngest child, known as Manny. He’s not just spoiled, he’s coddled, doted on, and just a hair short of being absolutely worshiped by the mother, maybe even the dad too in his own detached way.
The passages regarding the relationship between Manny and Greg almost make me sick. I find myself wanting to literally jump into those crude little drawings and kick the shit out of that weird-looking turd. Not only do the parents clearly favor Manny and all of his needs and idiosyncrasies above all else, Manny himself is overtly malicious towards both of his brothers. He appears to be able to constantly get away with breaking or ruining Greg’s few material possessions. His needs always come first, to the point where, in a motel room with one bed and one sleeper sofa, Rodrick is forced to make a bed out of the discarded couch cushions and Greg must make do with towels as sheets and pillows as goes down for the night in the closet. This isn’t merely comedy or an exploration of the injustices of being a middle child, this is borderline child neglect. If we’re talking real life here, his parents are constantly inflicting irreparable damage on their child. Do they treat Greg this way because he’s a cold, unfeeling monster, or has Greg morphed into such a monster absent any signs of love, affection, pride, or tenderness from his disillusioned parental units?
Manny is definitely the series’ most severe atrocity, though if we try to equate some semblance of real-life to these stories, it’s unlikely that we’d find such a malevolent force acting through such a young child. Instead, I see this as a symbol of the parents’ active and deliberate neglect of both Greg and Rodrick. It’s not that Greg is simply ignored, he is actively ignored to service Manny’s whims. It’s probable that this sort of behavior is what has created such an unfeeling gulf of spite and resentment between Rodrick and Greg in the first place; obviously this is a trend that will continue to persist as Manny grows older and develops a more independent relationship with Greg.
I know that the books are simply there to provide entertainment, but so are things like, say, sitcoms. Sitcoms may no be your typical depiction of every day life. I know my interactions with my family aren’t full of witticisms and one-liners at every turn. Yet even through some of the frankly mean-spirited banter exploited for laughter within a sitcom, there are frequent glimpses into the bonds that keep these characters close to one another and vested in each other’s happiness. This level of “heart” is precisely what Diary of a Wimpy Kid ignores and even actively avoids at times. I wish I could say that there was a glimmer of hope, or love, or even kindness underlying this “functionally dysfunctional” familial unit….but there isn’t.
In my opinion, these individuals have deep-seated issues that will require years of professional help to overcome. Rodrick is probably a lost cause. As a mid to late teenager, he’ll be out of the house in a couple of years, presumably to pursue a career in his sub-standard metal band. I suspect his complete withdrawal from his parents after a few more years, when mooching off of them ceases to be practical. His apathetic and conformist upbringing haven’t quite given him the conviction or fuel he needs to do anything extreme with the rest of his life. He’ll spend the next decade or two scraping by with spartan accommodations, continually struggling with interpersonal relationships. If he’s lucky, I’d say there’s a 50/50 chance that he experiences an epiphany or wake-up call that he uses as motivation to go back to school and ink out a lower middle-class life for himself. Maybe he’ll even get married to a decent girl, but his views on children will be conflicted and he’ll probably have difficulty distinguishing between giving his own children too much or too little attention.
Manny will grow up privileged but unappreciative, honing his manipulative skills throughout childhood and viewing his parents as little more than tools to be used when needed. His keen intellect (based on his portrayal in the books) combined with a growing superiority complex will make for a dangerous adolescent. He’ll quickly ingratiate himself to the “in” crowd in order to feed his ego. As the furthest removed from actual human emotion of the 3 siblings, he’ll also certainly be a troublemaker as he seeks out novel and hedonistic experiences to fill his emptiness. As a young adult, his future remains uncertain. Does he crumble under the effect of the “real world” on his hollow shell? Or does he thrive in this new world of possibilities where he can take his methods of control and narcissism to brand new heights?
So how does Mr. Greg Heffley turn out? His outcome – in my mind – is a little more variable, since he’s in the unique position of being doubly shit on by his parents. He can’t capture their attention and admiration as the youngest, yet he’s not old enough to enjoy a level of independence that would help him escape his family’s grasp, if only for short periods. He’s subjected to constant injustice: Rodrick is never punished for his behavior towards Greg and Manny’s infractions are quickly dismissed as acceptable accidents. In all serious , I could see a future 15 or 16 year old Greg carefully weighing the pros and cons of suicide, or maybe something a bit less drastic like running away or making arrangements to live with a friend.
I also see Greg becoming more like Rodrick as he moves into his teenage years, especially without any positive role models to take influence from. It’s only a matter of time until Greg figures out how to channel/repress his resentment and loneliness, and I think the slacker-bully stereotype wouldn’t be a huge leap for Greg to take from “awkward preteen.” Over time he’ll probably fall in with some other like-minded teens who were forgotten or discarded by their parents in one way or another. Their early attempts at finding meaning and acceptance will come in the form of semi-nerdy hobbies: video game, trading cards, maybe a special TV show or book series. It could end there, and Greg and his weird little clique could persist through high school, perhaps on into “real life,” where he never is able to socially mature.
Depending on his friends of choice, Greg might trade in his 20-sided die for a glass pipe. Having such a dull and restrictive homelife, I imagine he’d be rather taken with recreational drug use. Would it ever get out of control? Again, hard to say. Either way, I imagine it leveling out as he becomes a young adult. He probably attempts a couple of semesters at college, though his eventual lack of motivation and willpower impede his progress. I see him ending up much like Rodrick, scraping by to provide the absolute essentials for himself, but on the inside, I think he’s far more conflicted compared to Rodrick’s numbness. Greg eventually makes a conscious decision to pull himself together, though he finds himself haunted by his parents’ lack of affection. Of all the siblings, he’s the one that tries to confront them about their mistakes. I think Greg will actively try to make peace with the situation, but I’m not sure if his parents are the kind of people that will ever have an explanation or apology that’s good enough to put him at ease. At some point Greg will come to a crossroads where he can decide to be everything his parents weren’t, or he can give into his fears and let that pain and confusion sit with him the rest of his days.
Bleak, right? But that’s what I get out of reading these books. I know it’s not meant to be taken so seriously, but it still bothers me that these books are absent anyone to admire or root for. It bothers me that the distant and aloof parents are played up for laughs when their actions are psychologically injurious. It bothers me that these parents hardly even bother to listen to these kids. It bothers me that they’ve created an unjust household; it’s all shits and giggles in the book, but in reality homes like this breed fear, anger, and distrust, and are exactly the places that produce children who are desperately seeking attention and acceptance any way or anywhere they can get it. Just how much do they have to do to finally get the attention of their parents? Get in a fight? Buy some drugs? Pick up a knife? Pick up a gun?
I suppose at this point we can safely assume that Greg’s own egocentric and self-serving behavior is a product of his family life, but this doesn’t mean I like him any more than I did. So much of the realism has been taken out of the situation that it’s hard for me to pity Greg. I guess I would feel better if Greg wasn’t such a blatant extension of his repressive home life. I’d rather see a strong main character – or at least a main character who is trying to be strong. Instead he goes right along with it, inflicting his pain on others. This obviously isn’t the focus of the series, but my point is that if the author is going to fabricate such a miserable family life for Greg, why make Greg just as miserable and off-putting as his oppressors? He should at least possess a modicum of the things his family is missing: integrity, empathy, honesty. What does Greg do other than perpetuate the cycle in his own preteen way? If these books contained even a sliver of hope or redemption I would have no problem chalking it up to humor….but this isn’t the case. The novels are absolutely incorrigible.
Have I read too deeply into a series of books meant for 9 to 13 year olds? Yes and no. Nearly nothing that I’ve discussed is explicitly mentioned in the books, but it is disconcerting that I’ve been able to extrapolate so much out of the series just off the top of my head. I bet I could make even more of a case if I had the text in front of me and a handful of accepted studies regarding child neglect and lack of affection during childhood. Did the author intend to craft such a bleak and borderline depraved body of work? I want to say “no,” but at the same time I think that the conspicuous lack of anything resembling a healthy relationship is mildly disturbing. While it is important to take the narrator into consideration – Greg himself – I still find it highly unlikely that he would deliberately refuse to write down anything nice about anyone in his private diary.
At the end of the day, I guess it’s not that big of a deal, and I certainly won’t sanitize why my kid reads because of some potentially bizarre subtext…but I still don’t think it’s a particularly healthy model of a family – unless it’s somehow made clear that this is precisely how a family should not conduct itself. I’m sure the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series is perfectly safe for all but the most reality-challenged of children, and I’m sure that the laughs balance out the more unrealistic aspects. I would be interested in pitching a few questions at the author though…I just can’t quite wrap my head around the very real darkness that lurks between the lines.
Written by The Cubist
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