Recently I reviewed the NES QuickShot Joystick, which I found to be an unnecessary, yet sufficient, joystick controller for the Nintendo Entertainment System. Along the lines of other QuickShot controllers, considering they made a large variety of these things, I stumbled upon my black, red, and blue QuickShot Flight Grip controller, also known as the QuickShot Handlebar controller. Its intended function is to provide gamers with a new, realistic, and exciting gaming experience! The result is quite opposite.

This black QuickShot Flight Grip controller has all of the same buttons as an original game pad, yet located “ergonomically” for ease of access to said buttons. With one button located on the side facing the gamer, that one is intended for the player’s right thumb. The other button is located on the reverse side, which is intended for the player’s right index finger. Unless you are a really tiny person (or maybe a child), you’ll end up pressing the backside button with the part of your index finger that touches your palm. Believe me, this is an uncomfortable and awkward way to use that button. Furthermore, there are no markings on the controller to tell me which button is which!

I’ve come to the conclusion that this controller was not meant for adults. Some controllers function well in the hands of a variety of people, and this is not one of them. The entire thing is relatively small considering its intentions as a full-grip controller. I can’t find a single positive thing to say about the QuickShot Flight Grip. The round button facing the gamer doesn’t feel like it’s actually going to work when you press it, yet somehow it does. The tactile response on the d-pad is the same. You press the directional button and it works, but it doesn’t feel like you pressed it hard enough or something.

I can’t figure out what the purpose of this shitty “controller” is. I believe it was intended to better simulate playing games like Paperboy, or any motorcycle / flying game, but it literally shits all over your hands. One of QuickShot’s taglines is: “For Professional Players,” but it’s obviously for suckers and idiots dumb enough to think this made games better or more enjoyable. The entire unit is extremely awkward and entirely useless. You’ll struggle to press the buttons, your hand will spill over the ends, and you’ll actually get hand cramps after a while of vigorous playing! I know I did! The autofire feature is a useless gimmicky selling point that does nothing to save this poopstick from complete and utter negative criticism. You’re better off cutting the cord off and trying to use this piece of shit as a boomerang. It might not actually come back to you like a real boomerang, but at least you don’t have the QuickShot Flight Grip bringing your gaming reputation down anymore.

Pros:

• None

Cons:

• All